I’m Lillian V. Can you really see ME? I’m Salieri to a talentless Mozart. Silently passionate, screaming from the inside out. The more you boast the less you have to brag about. I love to be called out on my failures, big and small.The only way to improve yourself is to face the worst parts of who you are. Brutal honesty can be so refreshing when you know how to take constructive criticism. Sometimes (to a healthy extent) I fancy myself friends with people like Chris Crocker- because a real woman needs an unbiased opinion of a friend by her side to keep her from being typical and flighty; Bernadette Peters- I’ve wondered a time or two- if I kissed her lips, would I be able to soak up some of the energy that makes her so amazing?; and Tori Amos- I could watch her play the piano for hours, eyes focused on her funny lip shape. I love the weird way she sits on the bench. But, in reality, where I’m forced to live, I suppose my favorite friends are the ones who make me feel needed. Because, as much as I’d love to break free of my empathic, subservient nature, I love being able to be there when someone needs a special someone. I’d love to say my theme song is something like Head Like a Hole by Nine Inch Nails or Tori Amos’ Cornflake Girl , but it’s likely to wind up being Creep from Radiohead or the like. I desire to be closer to God than anyone else, I just think that what He expects of us is disgustingly misconstrued by money hungry, evangelistic child molesters who live in extravagant homes driving million dollar cars. For the first time in my life I’m taking myself out from underneath the “doom and gloom” version of Christian education & insisting on being given ALL my belief options. I’m Lillian V. Does that help you see ME?